The following is about the video adaptation. For the original webcomic, see When Bikes Argue.

When Bikes Argue is a short film based on the Dozerfleet Comics DSHW photocomic first created from July 3rd to July 5th of 2005. The film version was released to YouTube on January 26th of 2008.


This story introduces us to Colly, Ackro, and Hilo, three sentient bikes with radically different personalities. The three belong to a family that has made its way to a cabin in northern Michigan. When Colly complains that it was difficult to fit her on the minivan's harness, Ackro tries in detail to explain the logic behind the male dominance of bike harness manufacturing. This offends Colly's feminist sympathies, as she reacts to him with self-righteous denunciation of him. The Texas warhawk bicycle Hilo then accuses Ackro of being a communist and correctly identifies Colly as a feminist.

When Ackro tries to defend himself, Hilo changes the subject by talking first about the failures of NASA and then of his dreams of fighting terrorists. Ackro quickly blows off and ridicules Hilo's beliefs that the Islamic prophet Muhammad is secretly an undead vampire; and that the secret to winning the War on Terror is to drop a nuclear bomb on Mecca. Colly accuses the two male bikes of being racist, arguing that some of their paint was probably manufactured with Arab petroleum. She then suggests that one of Hilo's hypothetical nukes may be defective, which frightens Ackro. The three then argue about what holiday it is and when they'll get off the harness. The story ends with Ackro inquiring as to when the 4th of July fireworks start.


  • Green 1996 Huffy Snake Rock 15-Speed Bicycle as Ackro: A bike who is all concerned with fairness. He doesn't like conflict, but if one comes along, he tries to find the quickest way to fairly diffuse the situation. He is inspired by Church and Tucker of Red vs. Blue.
  • Black 1991 Schwinn Woodlands 21-Speed Bicycle as Hilo: A Southern-accented warmonger of a bike. He glorifies the thought of war, and dreams of being the one who destroys the entire Middle East. He hates Islamofascism with a passion, and frequently fantasizes about nuking Mecca. He suffers from many delusions, such as believing that Muhammad is a vampire and that grease smudges on the concrete floor of his home pole barn represent a usable map of Saudi Arabia for planning his war strategies. He is a stereotype of what Leftists believed the Bush administration was like in 2003 and 2004. His voice was inspired by that of Matt Hullum as "Sarge" of Red vs. Blue.
  • Cobalt-Blue 2005 Bicycle as Colly: A more liberally-minded bike than her male counterparts. She is obsessed with women's rights issues and sees gender inequality in nearly everything.



After the Dozerfleet founder had learned CSS, it was decided that the web pages for WBA were not on par with standards, and that a new DSHW would have to be assembled using the same 400px x 300px JPEG images. However, it became apparent by December of 2007 that this would both take too long and would interfere with production of Ciem and Ciem 2. Instead of a new DSHW, the 400x300 JPEGs were scaled upward into 640x480 images on Monday, January 21st of 2008.

By the following Wednesday, voice recordings into a VoIP mic and saved in Audacity were ported as MP3 files to become the dub track. The entire piece was then assembled in Adobe Premiere 5.5 to become a video version of the DSHW. The project was exported as a large AVI for TV and hi-band processing. The AVI was copied from there into Windows Movie Maker, and compressed into a WMV. The WMV file was then uploaded onto Dozerfleet Studios' YouTube channel, where it was further converted to an FLV file. The sequel, When Bikes Argue 2, was released to YouTube on June 23rd of 2008.


This story has no comments or ratings yet recorded for it on YouTube. It has been viewed 252 times as of 3:56 PM EDT of August 28th, 2012.



The images for this piece had originally been scaled down to 400x300 for DSHW distribution in the 2005 HTML 4.01 Transitional "fullscreen" format. When the decision was made that the piece would not be up-scaled to 500x282 for the 2007 XHTML 1.0 Transitional "widescreen" format, the images were instead up-scaled to 640x480 in Photoshop Elements. The movie was pieced together in Premiere with the audio, but the resolution and a lot of details were compromised when the picture was later shrunk down to 320x240 by YouTube.


The audio had the most problems with production. Frequently, the quality of Colly's voice is inconsistent in this piece. This is because of the high-pitch and mostly nasal voice that the Dozerfleet founder was required to speak in to record the voice. Similar problems with recording this nasal, feminine voice to Audacity with a VoIP microphone have resulted in the inconsistencies in depictions of Polly's voice in The Trapezoid Kids.

Hilo's voice was another source of problems. The intention behind his voice was to make him sound like the Red vs. Blue character Sarge. However, due to the limitations of both the software and imitation range of the voice acting, the character also sounds like Mutt Mackley. This voice requires strong grunting in the back of the throat, which frequently overpowers the VoIP mic currently used for Dozerfleet recordings. The result is the overmodulation of most of Hilo's sound files. Attempts to correct this overmodulation in Audacity have produced a noted reduction in end-result sound quality.

For the video production of When Bikes Argue 2, significant efforts were made to improve the quality of the voice recordings. However, Hilo's voice would persist to be a problem even for that production.

See alsoEdit

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